Space Cowboy...

Recently left wide awake, by a generous midday nap and post show adrenaline high, to channel surf the hotel TV menu late one night... Happening upon “The UFO Hunters” it seemed to me as the most entertaining choice and most likely to spur my imagination into flights of fancy...

Finally drifting off, trance like, but not yet asleep... “Do not adjust your set, we have taken control of your TV”, I heard the voice say from across the room.

Thoughts of my home in Wayne County began to fill my mind as a question floated like a dream above me... Why does it seem aliens only visit people missing teeth??? Are aliens afraid the rest of us will try to eat them???

I began to dream I heard my dogs barking at the bright lights in the distance, though being a few states away it may have only been my own snoring.

Maybe the aliens don’t realize rednecks have a recipe for every critter in their zoos... Whether they have teeth to chew ‘em or not...

But that could have just been the double order of teriyaki chicken wings washed down with numerous beers following the show, now coming back up for some late night comedy talk...

Maybe it was just the nightmare of the ass-tronaut ex-wife whose ass took up a lot of space...

I wondered... Are they coming to diversify some trailer park gene pools???

Dreaming my way back to Wayne County, where the only thing anyone understands about the theory of relativity is that everyone is a fuckin’ relative... Maybe I was just homesick...

Waking up and climbing into my VW Jetta wagon spaceship... Thinking I was George Jetson, I headed home for a reunion with “Jane” and our three “Astros”...

Only to arrive smelling like “Tarzan”, after 8 hours in the car... Swinging in on my vine to plant a big kiss onto the lips of my “Jane” as our three “Cheetas” danced like monkeys around us...

Happy not to be told to sleep in the barn... This Intrepid Space Cowboy was glad be home...