Big League Dreams
A gangly adolescent with Big League Dreams, dressed in
standard Catholic High School garb… Dress shoes, pants, collared dress shirt
and tie and sport jacket… His shoulder length hair, that everyone else also
seemed to be wearing at the time, more than ironically his only claim to
individuality… Boarded a school bus on a warm October morning in the early
1970s, lost in his typical teenage thoughts…
Homework and good grades, balanced of course against being a
nerd and not fitting in with the popular crowd… More than occasionally seeking
the approval he didn’t always get at home in ways the authority of the day
(Parents, Priests and Nuns) didn’t always appreciate… Speaking his mind, acting
out against authority, usually quite loudly and social commentary on the events
of the day or times… While garnering him attention, often had him in hot water
with the said authorities of a typical teenager’s life…
Many years later, those same “endearing” qualities… Speaking
his mind, often quite loudly… Acting out against authority and social
commentary would lead him finally to the stage… Where the safety it provides him
to say whatever was on his mind… While garnering the same immediate feedback
and acceptance from complete strangers, that he had sought from family and
friends his whole life…
But returning now, to our hero’s teenage thoughts as he
finds a seat on the bus… Of course Catholic High School girls, pressing the
short skirt limit as far up their thighs as the authorities of their day would
let them, always had a place somewhere in his mind… Though his attempts at the social
skills needed to interact with them were often met with rejection…
Sports were his refuge and warm October days in the early
1970s were a special time indeed… Weekday World Series games were still played
on sunlit afternoons back then… A gangly, adolescent boy with Big League Dreams
needed to take the necessary steps not to miss the action…
And low and behold the authorities of the day help provide
the means… A transistor radio with and ear piece tucked neatly in the inside breast
pocket of his sport coat provided the rest…
Earpiece cord running inside the arm of his coat to the palm
of his hand, he could sit head in hand during class… Feigning interest in
geography and social studies class while his mind’s eye pictured the
descriptions offered by the games announcers… And his teenage Big League Dreams
still alive he wondered if he’d ever get the chance to perform on as big a
stage…
Many years later… The realities of life having caused the Big
League Dream to be long since forgotten… Much to his surprise after 9 years of
military service, many years of a successful commercial nuclear power career
and numerous crappy relationships… The Big League Dream was suddenly back from
the dead and alive again!!!
No, he wouldn’t be hitting home runs or pitching no hitters
in the seventh game of the World Series… Our hero had seen a feature story in
the local paper about a comedy open mic… Where anyone could come in step on
stage be handed the microphone and try their hand at being funny…
Many years later, using those same “endearing” qualities…
Speaking his mind, often quite loudly… Acting out against authority and social
commentary that always seemed to get him in trouble, (sometimes it still does) with
a lifetime of experiences to talk about, our hero had found his home…
Of course he would have to spend his time in the minor
leagues honing his skills… Eventually, his Big League Dream became a reality
with opportunities to perform on Big League stages all across the country… Where
the safety it provides him to say whatever was on his mind… Garnered him the
same immediate feedback and acceptance from complete strangers, that he had
sought from family and friends his whole life…
Life’s twists and turns weren’t done with our hero, though
and last Friday night he stood at a bus stop in Idaho Falls… Listening to a
ballgame, not on a transistor radio, but his cell phone… Broadcast live over
the internet…
Choosing his seat as he boarded the bus… The immortal words
of “Crash Davis”, the veteran catcher in the movie “Bull Durham” echoed in his
ears… “What the hell am I doing in ‘A’ ball???
The twists of life having taken our hero back to the minor
league cities and minor league stages… He longed for one last shot at the Big
League Dream and Big League Stages… One last shot before he has to hang up his microphone
and settling for a “manager’s spot in Visalia” in his attempt to get back to “The
Show”…
Fates twists and turns have some good things left for our
hero… A chance to perform at the St. Charles, IL Zanies in June, the Twin
Cities, Joke Joint in July and Las Vegas in September as part of this year’s
World Series of Comedy are as good an ending as to this story as our hero could
have ever dreamed on those warm October afternoons many, many years ago…
One last chance to up step to plate and quoting Roy Hobbs in
“The Natural”… “To Swing Away”…
