Mornin' Wood, you like to come in???

'Twas the day after midnights, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, the cat caught the mouse;

The clothes were all hung on a chair,
In hopes that laundry day soon would be there;

Nestled we were, all snug in our bed,
While visions of cool breezes danced in our heads;

Me in my skivies,
but holy they weren't,
since Wal-Mart had a sale 3 pair for a five,
and Jack in his collar,
I awoke with a holler,
When out on the porch there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what the FUCK was the matter.

Away to the door I stumbled slowly,
Totally unready for the sight before me,
As I opened the door, what should appear,
But a miniature old lady with big blue hair,
With a sales pitch so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment see was looking at my "Rick",

So I said with a grin,
Mornin' Wood, you like to come in?

She said If you're sleeping, you should put up a sign.
I asked Are you blind?
It seems plain to me,
and says Private Property!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!
And don't come back in the fall,
Jehovah she witnessed,
But the wrath of God they'll see,
If they come back here at all,
I shut the door tightly,
and said DAMN I've got to pee.

How Do You Know???

John 11:48-50 (New International Version, ©2010)
48 If we let him go on like this, everyone will believe in him, and then the Romans will come and take away both our temple and our nation.”

49 Then one of them, named Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, spoke up, “You know nothing at all! 50 You do not realize that it is better for you that one man die for the people than that the whole nation perish.”

As the left rushes to pin responsibility for yesterday’s shooting in Arizona on Sarah Palin and the Tea Party… I thought I would present another possibility… It has as much credibility as any I have read from the left… Maybe more so…

Maybe, just maybe she was picked by the Democratic Party to be the one to die lest the whole Democratic Party perish…

As Oswald was a stooge for those plotting a bigger conspiracy…

This whack job was just the useful idiot they were looking for to spin a tragedy against those trying to take away their temple (The Capital Building and the White House) and nation…

And before you condemn me for floating this theory… Let me ask you… How can you be sure it’s not the case???